Yesterday, while watching the baby crawling around, climbing on the cooling rack (look, she kept crawling into the kitchen to try to get it; I had to give in) I thought hmm, that has some sharp edges, maybe that's how she got that scrape on her finger. I thought better about my cooling rack as toy plan, put it back in the kitchen, and tried to get the baby interested in her ever-growing pile of legitimate toys that she is so over.
Later, while taking a shower I realized that I am the one with the scrape on her finger. I apparently don't know the difference between my baby and my self any more.
Since our trip to Utah, the baby has decided that sleeping in a crib is not for her. She's no dummy and has realized that only an idiot would sleep in a crib when there is a cozy warm bed available with near-instant access to the milk supply. I can't deny that it was sweet at first, the cozy sleeping with the baby, but I am so over it.
I'm pretty sure I could find a bunch of advice about how to break baby's attachment to comfort objects like the pacifier, or a blanket, or a stuffed animal. What I want is advice about how to create that attachment. We have this sweet little stuffed octopus, and I'm pretty sure that it could be a good stand-in for a mama during a long night of sleep. But the baby is not convinced of this. If you have any suggestions for creating lasting bonds between a baby and an inanimate (but cozy! I'm not a monster) object, please let me know.
Woven Histories and Modern Abstractions
3 months ago
6 comments:
Oh. So. Me. Too. Baby. There are better things out there than breastmilk. There must be.
May your finger heal quickly and the baby realize it's so much more restful to sleep on your own.
Seriously, I created a false attachment in my little one. There was there gorgeous toy that I had to get, and pay more than was sensible for, and listen to the Dad advice "that's a waste, he'd rather have the box" -- which of course turned out to be entirely accurate and I couldn't have that... SO, I would let him witness me oohing and aahing and cuddling said over-priced Mom-had-to-have toy, and then I would set it back up on top of the too high to reach (and too smooth to climb) fridge away from baby. After two weeks, I "accidentally" left it down on the couch cushion and it has been one of his prized possessions since. And Dad had to eat his words (OK, manipulative, but effective - effective is what we're going for, right?)
Maybe have the toy be associated with something that sweet baby loves? I watched my son and daughter-in-law create a calm bedtime ritual with a seahorse that had music in it--it was too adorable, and it really did help the baby sleep more easily. And that seahorse! *I* loved that seahorse!
Or so it seemed to me, who as a mom just basically gave in all the time unti the time for weaning rolled around. Not that I minded all that much. The weaning time came sooner than I thought.
Not that I know this will work for an infant, but a few years ago Son took to sleeping with a shirt of mine. So my advice would be to give her a shirt of yours or something that smells like you and she can use it as a blanky. Or you sleep with the octopus for a few nights and then give it to her and maybe it will smell like you?
We made Son sleep in his crib and in general it led to better sleep (for us), but now that he's 9 I sort of wish we had kept him in our room for a little longer. (I also wish he was small enough to hold and that he still napped, if we're keeping track of irrational wishes).
But I also recognize that that is easy for me to say, speaking as the parent of a child who sleeps through the night on a regular basis. Jason was just saying today that we are halfway through Son's "regular" life at home (I guess Jason plans on kicking him out when he turns 18).
This probably wouldn't work just yet for a six-month-old, but Stella has a couple of stuffed animals that I make part of the bedtime routine. She was going through a little bedtime rebellion phase, so I started asking her, "Where are Bunny and Teddy? It's time for bed! Can you find them and put them to bed in your crib?" She goes and finds them, they sit with her while we have a bedtime story, and then she puts them to bed. All this seems to make her feel a bit better about going into her crib.
You are smart to nip the co-sleeping in the bud if you really are over it. I could never bring myself to do it as the result is my 5 1/2 year old still climbs in bed with us EVERY night. The other two got kicked out when I was pregnant with a younger sibling because there just wasn't room, but as my baby he hasn't been forced out. I just kept thinking that eventually he'd prefer his own bed. Maybe when he's 8?!
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