i'm just listening to this radiolab podcast about how infants respond to sensory input, that even though their senses function, they don't function in the way that we expect them to, in a way that we would describe as conscious. Sights don't necessarily register in the vision center of the brain, transforming them into who knows what--data, but not necessarily meaningful data. Babies that stare may just be experiencing a brain glitch, unable to move their gaze away rather than presenting a keen interest in a specific object or individual. But our reactions, as adults, assume that the infant is seeing, hearing, gazing, etc. and that assumption helps the infant to learn how to make sense of all of that sensory input.
This pregnancy thing has me thinking about lots of things, wondering how we humans work.
A friend asked me the other day whether I would find out the sex of the baby. I don't care, either way. I'm not going to make a big deal of trying not to find out, but I wouldn't really care if I didn't know. She said it was nice to find out, because then you could start bonding with the baby. And I wondered why the baby's sex makes a difference in the bonding. Do I need to know the baby's sex in order to think of the baby as a real entity, someone who will be part of my life? I do know, though, that seeing an ultrasound picture of my baby--the sort of picture I've never really gotten excited about (or understood) when someone else showed me--made me feel instantly attached to and protective of this new person. What are the things--sex, image, voice, etc.--that allow us to envision and embody human life, to make it real and meaningful for us.
And the other thing I am wondering about. I find it perfectly normal, this idea of a fetus growing inside of me, this person who is totally dependent on me yet totally independent--already with its own heartbeat and blood type. It doesn't seem odd or unusual, and yet the other day when I thought about while this baby growing hair while still in the womb, I sort of freaked out. I try not to think about the hair because it does truly disturb me. So, why does the whole process not freak me out, yet hair does? Will was tormenting me last night with stories about the baby and its Don King hairdo.
People are funny and I think pregnancy may be one of those things that reveals our strangeness more than anything else.
Ruth Asawa retrospective in MoMa
3 months ago
6 comments:
I love picturing your baby with a Don King hairdo. Ross was born with a full head of hair, so it seems normal, but I can't say I ever thought about him having hair when I was growing him inside me. Which does seem weird...
I can't wait to see your baby...on the outside!
Yes, absolutely. Pregnancy definitely personifies our own distinct weirdness. The particular things we each worry about are fascinating. Everyone deals with the health worries, the longing for a healthy baby is completely embraced. But the worry over hair growing on an individual inside your womb? Yup - that one's all you! Enjoy every bit of strange wonder. It really is magic! So excited for you and glad to see a Lis style post! Love you lady! (FYI - I was born with a full mohawk of black hair which didn't settle down until I was 2. Will had a mop of dark hair. So our Justice had a full head of glorious dark hair with ringlets by his ears... You better ask the Moms!)
Well, there is something utterly uncanny about a whole other person inside a person. But also something so intimate. I am also really looking forward to seeing that little human.
Will: rude. Now get your wife some candy, stat.
Hair on a fetus? Shoot, that's nothing. When I found out that our Croissant was a boy and realized that this meant I had had (and would continue to have) a penis growing inside me 24/7 for months--now, that's freaky.
Congratulations! Ed and I are so happy for you and Will and the little hairdo. You really are a baker extraordinaire!
For me, it was when I read that girls already have all their eggs when they're born. The thought that my potential *grandchildren* were inside me, sort of ... that was pretty weird.
love this post...pregnancy sure does make us think differently than we have ever before. You do not need to know the gender to bond. We purposely did not find out the gender with Jordan and Spencer. It drove everyone around us nuts. "How will we know what to get you?" What the heck did they before sonograms?
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